if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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