Your tits are I can't wait for
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
