Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
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