This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
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