She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
