So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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