Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
