She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
