They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Congratulations! We have a period
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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