so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
