At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
