Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
