I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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