I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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