Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
