i barfeds in our rink
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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