When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
