I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
