it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I will die if light touches me.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
