Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
