I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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