You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Randomize
