either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
