I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
