So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
