I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
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