New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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