Midget sex pt 2 tonight
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
