He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Be still, my beating vagina.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Randomize
