Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
you made out with another girl for some wings
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
