So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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