Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
where are my pants?
in the oven.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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