Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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