i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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