We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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