I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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