Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
