dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Randomize
