At least make sure they are 18
Why
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
