That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
