So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
