just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
