This girl is more easily done than said...
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
