I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
