Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
