So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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