When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize