barbara walters just said penis...
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
