i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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