Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
