So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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